Carson Daly what have you done?

On June 28, 2011, in BooYa's Hookah Bar, by BooYa

Dear Carson,
You have done so many wonderful things for others. You’ve helped careers, promoted the work
of many, brought attention to places that deserved it. It’s unfortunate, in that light, that you’ve
now become Nick Lachey 2.0. Lachey has the advantage of illiteracy in this one, but your eye-lock on the
teleprompter hypnotizes many into a near homicidal belligerence. I thought that with Lachey doing the face
portion of the Sing Off, we had our unfortunate generational talking smile-pimp. How sad it will be for
you that day long from now when you realize that your early brilliance faded into the pathetic role of
talking head. Carson, I so badly want to love you, but don’t let this be the definition of you.

The Voice itself I love, but you Carson should have left this part of it to the likes of Lachey. Cee Lo is showing everyone he’s a genius. Adam is such a master of his element I want to hug him. Blake, though distractingly tall could give color commentary on anything and make it more enjoyable. Christina commands attention even without that incomparable cleavage. You Carson have the unfortunate role. I find myself wishing every time you talk as VoiceHost, that someone would drown your voice out with the Muppets version of Mahna Mahna. There are no more Dick Clarks, no more Chuck Woollerys, no more room for the true brilliance that made those mento-smiled wordslingers so loved for what they did. I don’t want to see you do this to yourself Carson, I don’t want to see you choose the complacent face time that we’ll all look back on as Obamish. Teleprompter faceholders of today will be the joke of tomorrow and that tomorrow is always in a hurry to bend you over its knee, paddle in hand. Carson, choose this if you must, but do it with the acceptance of your fate. Do it knowing you will sacrifice yourself to trivia, humor, and the ire of those who could see it coming all along.

 

Early Learning

On April 30, 2011, in Bleu's House, by bleu

Sometimes, when you get into the education field, you get sucked into politics, my soul now belongs to Education Politics, for 2 years anyhow.

I just sent a letter to my Senators asking them to support the Early Learning Challenge Grants Fund legislation. Why? Well, the goal of this legislation is to build a comprehensive, high-quality early learning system for children birth to age 5. Access to quality affordable childcare and preschool is something I think every family deserves.

The legislation would provide $1 billion a year for eight years to states to develop and enhance high-quality early learning opportunities for all young children, birth to five. These grants focus on building parent support and engagement, increasing access to quality child care and creating real quality standards.

High-quality early learning programs for children under age 5 matter in today’s economy more than ever. As the Wall Street Journal reported last week, more and more women are returning to work to support their families and consequently, across the country, child care centers are seeing their enrollment rise.

It’s time to make this legislation a reality! Join me and send a letter today! I mean everybody in every state..write a letter, an email..make a phone call to the lawmakers in your state and ask them to support Early Learning!

Remember, the little ones of today are going to be the ones caring for this country when we are in the twilight of our lives. Early learning programs foster and cultivate those quickly growing minds, helps open crucial windows of opportunities for learning, and helps every child have the confidence they need to be successful academically and socially in our communities!!!

The big question you need to ask yourself and everyone around you is: Is it worth the tax dollars being spent to educate the next generation now, or will it be better to wait to spend those same tax dollars later on the welfare and prison ($30,000/year/inmate) systems when they are adults?

Thanks!
WSA Headstart and ECEAP
Moms Rising Blog
Washington State Schools

 

Bleu

On April 30, 2011, in Bleu's House, by bleu

So this is Lampoon Legion..and I am bleu…a nickname that I have had for most of my life in some form or other. MrEMann and Mr Booya are my cohorts.We started this site, as most do, to express our views and perspectives on life, the interwebs, and what have you. I am a photogeek who is disenchanted by the ‘quality’ or lack thereof in the photo sites on the interwebs. I am currently awaiting my gallery to be set up here. Until then, I will post a link to my work on JPG magazine. It’s decent sort of place, which actually publishes a magazine, but I don’t feel like what I do fits in there. The photography there is amazing, my work is different..I like to capture the human element, in real time, with little posing or fancy photo finishings.

So here is my first entry. Hope you enjoy!
http://www.jpgmag.com/stories/11760

 

Six Degrees of Liberal Fault

On April 30, 2011, in BooYa's Hookah Bar, by BooYa

Six degrees of Kevin Bacon is a book and game based on the concept of what is called the small world phenomenon and assumes that anyone in hollywood can be linked to Kevin Bacon within Six steps. I propose that the same idea can be applied to placing blame onto the cumulative which I refer to as ‘liberals’ In modern american politics liberals have become the exact opposite of what they intend and profess to be. Liberals in their most basic beliefs, claim to favor individual liberty and oppose restrictions on liberty whether from religion, government regulation, or class structure. Today’s American liberal is what is most accurately called a ‘social liberal’, one which supports social programs, progressive taxes and a very broad concept of what is a right. A very large proportion of these social liberals take this further, to a point
where the majority are experiencing an erosion of rights so that the ‘minority’ or in most cases ‘the ones who cry loudest’ can enjoy the things they want. Classic Liberalism was once defined by statements from the likes of Henry David Thoreau – “that government is best which governs least.” Though now we have more of the build it bigger because the idiots cannot do it themselves approach from our elected liberals. Taking the time to spell it all out here would be quite ridiculous, but it would only be fair to give a bit of a push by way of example, and not even the easy one of Al Gore causing global warming so that he could valiantly break the news to us in mock despair.
Darfur… The civil war in Darfur is clearly the fault of liberals.
1.The civil war in Darfur is an ethnic war as opposed to a religious war as previous wars in the region..
2.Liberals find ethnicity a much more acceptable topic than religion.
3.When the conflict began on Feb 2 2003, liberals were still stinging from Republican gain of control in the US Senate
4.Liberals needed a sufficient distraction from their own excessive idiocy.
5.Liberals created a civil war in a foreign country.
Infallible logic. Ridiculous political ideology. Whatever the problem, be assured you can find the connection to why it is the fault of the liberals.

 

The Passion of the Black Jesus

On April 30, 2011, in BooYa's Hookah Bar, by BooYa
Everyone, as we’re told, is human and therefore will have shortcomings, or failings, or even inabilities. Throughout history people have wanted to point at others and see them as perfect though.  Whether it was Lennon, Reagan, Kennedy, Jordan, or Oprah, people have always wanted someone to look to as the modern messiah. Some bask in this and use the opportunity to marinate themselves in the glory until the inevitable messianic complex develops.  Some fight it or deny it trying to keep their bearings and personality intact. Most often these people have been musicians, or athletes, but more recently we’ve collectively, albeit likely unconsciously, decided that our current Godlike adoration belongs with a politician. Mr Obama, the Obamessiah, is just the man for such a job. Just the person our collectively frail psyche needs to look to for perfect leadership of hope.  We eat and eat greedily from that buffet of false hope feeding as if we’re starved.  We walk along as lemmings willfully betraying our ingrained need for individuality and self importance in favor of the high we get from feeling love and adoration for whomever we decide to errantly throw it upon.
I ask now, rhetorically, what happens when that super duper image of perfection starts to fade to us. When we start to lose our false impression. When we see through the dream we’ve insisted upon seeing and are shown the reality that our object of desire is just as human and real as the rest of us.  I know that many were ready for change, that many needed the metaphorical savior to change our outlook on life, yet why have they insisted upon foregoing reality for the sake of that icky warm feeling?  A lesson that has been repeated many times and will be repeated many more. We cannot falsify reality and expect anything less than disappointment.  Our commander-in-chief, the Black Jesus himself, is walking that path of disappointment, now, that we all set him upon, and has no other option at this point than to turn his sights to the next task: fail as intended. 

 

 

 

Here we go again. Again.

On April 30, 2011, in Uncategorized, by admin

Hello and welcome.  We have changed our layout, and delivery format again.  It is kind of annoying, but it is difficult in this day and age to find just the right medium that suits everyone.  You, the Great and Powerful reader, don’t really care as much what it looks like.  Hell, I’m sure you probably could care less about us being here.

The contributors, on the other hand, are a fickle bunch.  It has to be powerful enough to impress and allow them flexibility for a multitude of razzle-dazzle and flair, but simple enough that they still actually want to use it.  Yes, they are an easily put off bunch, a tad lazy in their ways (as indicated by their erratic-at-best posting), and even a little ego-maniacal but they are at least reasonable at what they do so we try our best to accommodate them here at Lampoon Legion.

So once again I bid you welcome.  Come in, stay a spell, and (hopefully) enjoy what we have to offer.  If not and you think you can do better, please feel free to apply for an opportunity to contribute.